Islam Is Boring

There’s nothing exciting about its Five Pillars, and I want to go kayaking instead, and then if I have to, I will finish some chemistry homework when I return, rather than engage in some type of dutiful prayer.   And God knows subservience is expected by villains whose slaves will be free in the days to come.

I would like to see some casinos in Algeria and Iran.  There’s not much to do over there, and its residents need more flavour in their lives.  So, here are some hobbies I offer you to indulge in:  Photography, hiking, birdwatching, wordworking, drawing, dancing, playing board games, doing crosswords, skating, acting, swimming, camping, playing musical instruments and there’s so much more, and use internet search to find them.

Regarding the Five Pillars, Shahadah is unnecessary, because God doesn’t need a contract, or religion where you have to prove yourself worthy to “him.”  “He” is instead, here to help you out.  You don’t need Salat, as God is here for you for all eternity.  “He” knows what you want, and will teach you balance, so 2 scoops (rather than 3) of ice cream is great as it is.  Make sure you go to a decent parlor, and get the flavour you want.  Zakat, give out of unconditional love for poor people, rather than obligation.  Of course, no more poverty in the coming of days.  Sawm is a no.  God just wants you to walk away from being evil, and have a good life.  No fasting necessary.   Hajj is not required.  You don’t need to devote yourself to God, yet realize “his” phenomenal knowledge of love, that “he” will always be with us.

And then maybe I will play in Jordan or Sudan?  It would be pleasing to see some type of poker tour transpiring in the Arab world.

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